And the position is filled.

Mark, 20 year old proxy from Ghent. He will be my new assistant. Checked out his records and they're good enough. I'm making him write up this post while I have a gun pointed to his head.
Wanted to see how well he performs under stress. I'll let you guys be the judge over this guy.

I'm sure he is very happy with his new position. He should be, its an honor to be my personal bitch. I'm not the easiest boss to work for , I admit. But at least its better than being crawled up in some hellhole withering away while trying to catch some stupid runner. Isn't it?

I said.. Isn't. It?

 Yes, Ma'am

Good bitch. Now post this and go get my coffee.

Ugh adminstration

Reorganizing is a bitch. I need a new assistant, my last one got killed when we were dealing with that wild runner infestation. So any Belgian proxies that want this promotion should send me a mail.
I'll sort through the candidates and stuff. Who knows, maybe I'll pick your dumb ass. Probably not.



P.S. Bringing me a runner I can torture might increase your chances of getting this job. I need something to vent my frustrations on. 

A message from your boss.

I'm not the type to make speeches to boost morale. I'm not the kind of boss that cares for the people under her command. But I am the boss that will rebuild and make us stronger. I am the boss that will lead the revenge for our fallen brethren. 

EAT struck us hard. But not hard enough. EAT and her little pets will pay for what they've done. From this moment on any campers you see are to be killed on sight. Same counts for EAT's little pets. Except Echo, she's mine.

I will be sending orders to all remaining bases. Some of you will be transfered. All of you will be receiving training to ensure that next time we won't fall so easily. The proxies of Belgium will have their revenge.

-Discordia

Status report.

Discordia: "A proxy base in the west is being attacked. Sent my men as reinforcements."



Assistant:"More bases are being attacked Ma'am."
Discordia:"Which ones?"
Assistant:"All of them."
Discordia:"What the fuck, how is that even possible?"
Assistant:"I don't know Ma-"


An explosion. Heh. They're here. Finally.

Guests

Finally the fuckers arrived.
Which fuckers? These fuckers.

Rogue proxies. My men had our eyes on them. Can't trust rogue proxies.
Not that they were a threat, far from actually, but I like knowing these things. Comes in handy when doing my job.
I let them in because I knew they were coming. (They said so on their blog. Idiots.) Had my men check them for weapons. You now, just in case. Once they were searched my men sent them into my office.


Me:"Took you long enough. So what is it that you want from me?"
Their leader signaled for them to answer.
Fuck face #1: "We just wanted to talk to you about-"
Me:"Yeah, screw that. I don't really give a shit."

I shot her in the foot. That shut her up.

Me:"I know what you guys are after. Funny thing is, I'm after the same things. And unlike you I actually have the resources to get it done. Which is of course why you came to me. But the problem is my info doesn't come free. I can give you a lead but from now on you report to me, personally. You're my bitches now. Got it?"

Fuck face #2:"What? No way we're not working for you! We operate on our own!"

My men enter the room. Aim their guns at the girls.

Me:"Not anymore you don't. Two options. You work for me, or you die right here. And I'd rather not get more of your blood stains on my carpet."

Their leader nodded.
I gave them the Info and told them to get the fuck out.
As much as I want to tell you guys what these fuckheads are after, I can't. Its classified. But I'm pretty sure these fuckers will screw up and release the info eventually anyway. But then at least its not my fault. I'm already getting enough shit from my superiors.

I don't like waiting.

Seriously, I've got shit to do. I don't have time to sit here and wait for you fuckheads to arrive.
Stop messing around with whatever you're doing and get your stupid asses over here. Now.